A day in a Korean Kindergarten

It has been awhile since I have posted. Sadly I lost a close friend this past week, and the days have somewhat blurred together. I miss you everyday Adam.

I have decided to do a play by play of what my day is like working in a Korean kindergarten. I arrive at work at 9 or 9:30 depending on my director's mood. I then have "preparation" time until around 10 (and by prep time I mean facebook and email checking time).  From then on I teach different classes around the school. Some of these are 20 minute "storybook" lessons in which I "teach" a book to various classes.

Ho-ki, Tam-ki, Yu-ki etc. are called the 5 year classes but since Koreans count age differently than we do they are actually 3-4 years old. In Eastern age reckoning newborns start at one year old and each passing of the Lunar New Year, rather than the birthday, adds ones year to the person's age (thanks Wikipedia for making me sound so intellectual). So with this aging system I am, in fact, 26, bummer. Anyway, back to attempting to teach 3-4 year old Korean kids the English language. Just imagine trying to teach an American 3 year old Korean and that sums up that part of my day. The one good thing I have going for me is these kids have never had a female foreign teacher before so I still have some shock value and having their mouths dropped open in awe keeps them relatively quiet. After 20 minutes of singing, dancing, emotions, "reading" and usually a BM or two (the kids, not me) I crawl out of the class drained.

The 6 and 7 year storybook classes usually go pretty smoothly. Strangely enough white skin is considered beautiful here so I am greeted every so often with a class full of Korean children chanting beau-ti-ful in their cute little accents. I have to admit it is not a bad way to start the day. When I am not doing storybook I am in the "English Village".  It is a sweet room filled with different stations for situations and role play. This month we focused on classroom stuff and beauty shop. We also teach the kids about different countries (apparently America is the only ethnocentric country who doesn't care about other cultures) and this month was Korea and America. We learn (I say we with all seriousness, I am finding out some new things with the kindergarten classes, great) how to say hello in different languages, what food people eat, and about other traditions.

Beauty Shop, Groovy House, and Food court

Market

                            
Everyday (and sometimes twice a day) I teach 40 minute classes to our "Schule" kids. They pay more to have extra lessons so I find myself walking into their classrooms way too often. The 6 years (really 4-5 year olds) are called Lancaster class and the 7 years (5-6 year olds) are Gryffindor class (no, I did not name them). They are a pretty rambunctious lot considering they have class in English for the majority of the day and are bored to death. Despite their crazy ways, I have developed relationships with all of the kids. We even got to go on a super awesome fieldtrip to....Lotte Mart (Walmart). If anyone thinks that taking 17 four to six year olds to a mega department store is a good idea, think again. For the most part they were actually quite well behaved and even got to purchase things and practice their English by asking the non-English speaking cashier "how much is it?" Another fun thing we did with the Schule classes was an American event day. Aaron and I taught them to line dance to good ol' Billy Ray Cyrus's rendition of "Achy Breaky Heart" and it was pretty amusing. We then did makeovers for everyone, the boys included because, let's face it, Korean men are preeeeetty metro. Finally we got to have burgers! We were so excited to have a taste from home and passionately showed the kids how to make a proper burger but when we got to the meat, we were viciously shut down. The "burgers" were some kind of soy/mystery meat cut into square shapes and no thicker than a quarter inch... so much for that idea.

Cara making the flag

Amuuuuurica

Colin and Ruby

Luna and Kelly

Dan and Amy

Cara and Kate

Eric and Robin

Chris

Sarah and Evie being racist

Jack and Ben

Emily and Katrina

Jack's nails

Robin's lipstick

Schule kids. Lacaster on left, Gryffindor on right.

Burger station

DISAPPOINTMENT

The kids with their burgers.

 I will write about Hollywood Kids, our drama class later. Until next time, here is some Engrish.

lunch

"The umbrella is unfolded toward sky, if it is stopped, rainbow will raise out of cloud."

"Do you what chocolate cooky?"

Alien Registration

In order to finalize our visas, Aaron and I had to submit ourselves to a Korean health screening. I was expecting a quick urine test to check for drugs. This country takes two things very seriously; child molestation and marijuana. I can see how the two are related, stoners generally start morphing into pedophiles when the ice cream covered Cheetos have run out. We were driven to the building in a matchbox car that made the Geo look like a Hummer, and we began. First stop was the dentist where, side by side, Aaron and I had our teeth poked and scraped while being forced to make "aaaa" then "eeee" sounds, obnoxious. Next stop was the x-ray room where, of course, something very important was lost in translation. I was told, or so I thought, to strip completely naked behind a paper screen and then don a hospital gown that was obviously reused time after time. After being manhandled by a seemingly disgruntled male nurse I was told to redress and leave. I found Aaron sitting on a bench and made a remark about how awkward that situation was. He stared at me quizzically for a second before I asked him if he also had to strip naked. Jenny, a coworker who was translating for us, started laughing hysterically and so kindly informed me that she meant I only had to be naked on my top. I am sure that the little man nurse got quite the shock when my ghostly pale ass walked into the x-ray room. Ugh. Horrified by what I had just done I marched back downstairs to have my blood pressure, weight, and height recorded. I was then reminded that I have terrible eyesight but learned that my hearing is tip top. For the drug test portion we were handed paper dixie cups the size of thimbles, and, naturally, I peed all over my hand trying to catch a sample. The day was not going well for me. After washing my hands a few dozen times I was called into a broom closet with a strange red hue and was told once again to take off my top. To avoid any further mistakes I very slowly took my hand up one sleeve, then the other, watching the nurse for approval the whole time. When I was nude up top again (it seems like being naked is a common topic for me) I lay down on the cot, unsure of what was happening. The nurse (female this time and the tallest person I have seen since arriving in Korea) clamped monitors on both my ankles and wrists then proceeded to suction monitors that resembled tiny hot air balloons all over my chest. It was the weirdest heart monitoring experience I have ever had. After they took a sample of our blood to make sure we are HIV free (if you have HIV they will escort you directly to the airport for your deportation) we were free to go. As if moving across the world is not hard enough, the alien registration health screening makes things just a little more interesting for expatriates.

Getting naked

"Bitch just come to Busan tomorrow! It would be so awesome" stated the text that I received from a friend, Leigh, on Tuesday. I didn't hesitate to take her up on the offer as it gave me a reason to put pants on for the first time in a week. Wednesday morning I made the terrible mistake of catching the bus downtown during rush hour. It was my first experience on a Korean bus and it put the saying that "Koreans don't respect personal space" into a real life fact. After a cramped ride I emerged at the bus terminal pouring sweat and gasping for air. I caught a 3 1/2 hour bus to Busan, the second biggest city in South Korea, to meet up with Leigh and her sister Shawn. We wandered around the city and came across Nampo, the fish/shopping market. We bought "kebabs" from a street vendor and were sadly disappointed as they were not the same heavenly goodness found in Europe that we were expecting. Here are some pictures of the market.

 Fake flower shop.

 Kimchi is a traditional Korean dish that is made of fermented vegetables (usually cabbage) and spices. It is served with every meal here and comes in a variety of types.

 Sorry.

 Seafood so fresh it is still alive.

 

 

We made our way out of the fish market, back to the street vendors to buy waffles stuffed with whipped cream/apple filling, and happened upon something magical. There was a dancing, costumed cat motioning to a stairwell leading to a "Cat Cafe". Having read up on these treasures before coming, I knew that it was not, in fact, a place to eat cat soup, but rather a coffee shop where you can play with kitties.

When in Korea...

 Herro priest.

 Not all the cats wanted to play.

 Our hairless friend who keep trying relentlessly to eat the leftover fish bean cakes in my bag.

We were amazed by the concept of this cafe, so naturally we decided we needed to find a dog cafe. A forty five minute subway ride later and we were in heaven.

Two hours later we said farewell to the twenty odd dogs we had been loving on and found some food. My first experience with Korean barbeque was perfect. We drank soju, a sweet, watered down vodka, and ate meat cooked at our table. The only way I can describe the flavor of the meat is through an "It's Always Sunny" reference when Charlie and Dee thought they were cannibals...it was hands down some of the best meat I have ever had. 

 

Full cloves are garlic in between pieces of beef.

After finishing another bottle of soju on the beach (and getting emotional in the way that is only possible when you are on the other side of the world with people who understand you better than you understand yourself) things got interesting. I asked Leigh where we would be staying that night and she giggled then admitted we would be sleeping in a bath house. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into as we took a cab to the Aqua Palace Hotel and Spa. After stashing our shoes in downstairs lockers, we took the pink pjs handed to us and climbed upstairs to the bath house. There was a brief moment of embarrassment but then the three of us were stark naked headed into a room full of various hot tubs. As it was near one in the morning, they were draining the tubs for cleaning. We found our water shield slowly draining out from under us, leaving us floundering and exposed like new borns in the bottom of a stone basin. We decided to call it a night, put on our pink sleeping uniforms and followed the signs to the relaxation room where we would be sleeping. The room resembled a yoga studio with heated hardwood floors (of course), yoga mats, blocks, and blankets that couldn't sufficiently cover a ten year old. We hauled some mats into a corner and grabbed a few blankets each, ignoring the sign that says take two (it was in Korean in our defense). The next morning we woke up to a breathtaking view of the ocean as the entire wall was glass. Shawn and I had to embark on a man hunt to find Leigh whose coughing fit caused her to leave the room in the night. We stumbled across rooms filled with clay balls, sand, rocks, saunas, etc. and decided that we needed to properly experience the bath house. With no hesitation we were nude once again. The three of us bounced from hot pool to pool while gazing out at the ocean, hardly believing that the whole ordeal cost us a little over $10. 

Hotel Aqua Palace

The next morning in the pajamas provided for us.

The view in front of the hotel.

All in all, Busan was amazing. Aaron and I will definitely be spending some time in the city. If  by any chance anyone is still reading this novel, maybe you can help me with this...

WTF?

Korean ER

So due to the fact that most people have no desire to read about other people's ailments I may have failed to mention in my last blog that I have been pretty sick since arriving in Korea. If you are one of those people now would be a good time to stop reading this post. I have had problems breathing, lymph nodes swollen to the size of grapefruits, and a fever that comes and goes as it pleases. Yesterday, after having a massive panic attack that had me convinced of my impending death which resulted in me calling Aaron to tell him goodbye, I started to feel ill again. Aaron came home and found me pouting in bed with eyes too swollen to open completely, a very high fever, and a restricted airway. Since Koreans are the nicest people on Earth there were two very concerned ladies from our school waiting downstairs to hear how I was doing, and once Aaron convinced me to get out of bed they rushed me to the hospital. Within five minutes of leaving my apartment I was in a bed and hooked up to an IV bag full of neon yellow liquid. I have never felt so restricted by a language barrier but thankfully I had a fellow English speaking coworker and two Korean angels to translate for me. Koreans go to the doctor for just about everything so the ER was constantly full of families chatting and waiting for their loved ones to finish their IVs. There was one very sick elderly lady who seemed to be in very serious condition which was pretty disheartening as her family was obviously distressed. The one highlight of my five hours in the hospital was when Aaron came back from the restroom looking as if he had wet himself. Apparently he has never encountered a bidet before, and after turning on the seat warmer and fan in an attempt to flush the toilet he was viciously attacked by the fountain of water meant to clean his derriere. I was finally released after two IVs, some liquid medicine and a giant fever control pill, and my savior boyfriend bought me a pizza and put me in bed. I am now confined to my bed because there is some protein (once again, thanks language barrier) that is too high in my blood and resting is the only thing that will lower it. I have 15 pills to take daily but my fever is down and I will hopefully be able to explore more of the city soon. For now, however, I will spend my time watching Starcraft tournaments complete with referees and commentators on Korean cable.

So this is Gwangju

The plane was massive and full of the usual 13 hour flight amenities (i.e. hot towels, personal TVs, slippers, toothbrushes). Despite the attempt of airlines to make things comfortable, long flights are the bane of my existence. The Seoul airport was wonderful with water fountains, flower gardens and customs that took no more than five minutes. We rounded up our light luggage (5 suitcases and a backpack) and somehow signed/pointed our way onto a four hour bus to Gwangju. Upon arrival we were instantly impressed by our apartment building with its key-less, number pad locks that sing a little jingle when opened. We were just tickled by our apartment with its heated hardwood floors, brand new appliances, sparkle counters, flower cabinets, and butterfly light fixtures (when I say tickled I mean that I was laughing hysterically while Aaron was cringing in disgust.)

Our apartment building...

the wall paper in our room...

the horrifying wall paper in the other room...

 pure delight...

our kitchen, please note the flower/butterfly designs...

Aaron standing in our shower/sink/toilet area in the bathroom slippers so graciously provided for us.

Our first day here we had time to relax, unpack, and explore our neighborhood. Within five minutes we found a French bakery and were happily sitting on a park bench eating pizza bread, curry chicken samosas, and apple tart, not too bad for our first meal in Korea. More exploring revealed fresh fish/eel/octopus tanks outside of every other restaurant, elaborate flower shops, and an angel themed cafe where we enjoyed some green tea and free wifi in wing backed arm chairs. We also encountered...

 puppies so small I was convinced they were fake...

so much shell fish...

apartments...

Grocery shopping was an experience due to the fact that we have a hot plate but no hose to connect it to the gas line. After much aimless wandering and attempted guessing as to what things were Aaron and I left with 30 rolls of toilet paper (the smallest amount we could buy), oranges, almonds, yogurt, and ramen (and along with the loaf of bread from the bakery it is all we have been surviving on.) Yesterday we had our first day of work in the castle that is Leader's Academy. Three floors and a basement/stage all beautifully covered in heated flooring and signs that made me feel like I was in Disneyland. It was orientation for the children and parents so obviously within an hour and a half of arriving at the school we were up on stage doing a song and dance that we had 30 minutes to prepare for. This would have been bad enough if we didn't have to follow a taekwondo set complete with a nun-chuck act... I don't want to go into the gory details but the Alpha friends song includes moves for egg elephant, Indian ink, Uncle umbrella and many others. The school is full of unique classrooms such as the safari room (full of dinosaur and ocean toys) and English Village (a room full of different play stations equipped with props i.e. restaurant, bank, beauty shop etc.) It really is impressive. Aaron started work on Friday but I don't actually start for another month so I should be doing a lot of facebook stalking and blog updates so I apologize in advance. Here are some highlights...

Aaron getting crunky...

 

Korean cable...

my super Asian neon phone...

 and this guy.

Lots of love. 

Kerryn